I Really Want to Lose Weight

I really want to lose weight. The weight of self-doubt, of overthinking, of assuming that most people are thinking the worst of me, and so I monitor my intake. I’m careful about the conversations I listen to, about the narratives I allow to play in my head. I am careful about who I let speak into my life (or rather who I take seriously😜). I am increasingly becoming disloyal to whatever is toxic to me; to perfectionism, to the shallow masks, facades, ways of introducing myself that make me feel good… for a moment. You know.. junk food. I no longer thirst for the lemonade of other people’s validation. Dude, I really want to lose weight. 

I want to lose weight, and so I exercise. I constantly ruminate on what I know to be true about myself: that I am loved unconditionally. I listen to my soul and nurture it, discovering who I truly am and embracing me. I take rests. I pat myself on the back when I’ve done a lot, and when I haven’t done anything, because I am worth validating.. as a being. I don’t need to “do” to prove myself. I am loved, worthy, and extremely valuable.. even in my sleep. *drops the mic* *picks it back up again* I make sure to always stay hydrated with love from God, from family, from friends, ..from me. I don’t forget my vitamins: those enriching conversations that can last for hours revitalizing my soul. The ones I have with God, with people, and with myself. You know, the ones that are full of laughter, that remind me how far I’ve come and show me just how far I can dare go. And ofcourse I sleep, trusting that the God who watches over me is staying awake for the both of us 😅💤😁 I really want to lose weight. #bodyconfessions

Don't worry. I know it can be rude to ask people about their weight, so I won’t ask you 😜